Recently, my daughter asked to do something, and as I opened my mouth to respond, my mother fell out. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love my mother and value her opinions and advice. But what happened here was automatic, without thought or actually weighing in with how I felt or checking in with what I thought. I defaulted to a voice that wasn’t mine. And my response wasn’t wrong, but it wasn’t actually right…for me, or for my daughter.
It took a lot of heart work to sit in silence, to drum up the awareness of what was my belief construct and what was my mom’s (and my dad’s for that matter…I had a messy mind on the subject), to separate between the automatic voice that wasn’t mine and the voice that was authentically mine but hadn’t been given the permission to speak. It took a lot of courage and strength to apologize to my daughter, to embrace my own viewpoint, to offer support and encouragement to her in a way that would honor her journey without tainting her experience with my beliefs or my parents beliefs. I’m talking about breaking generational patterns here. It isn’t easy…but it is possible.
This week, we are encouraged to be aware of the voices that are governing our decision making and how we show up in the world around us. Are we defaulting to responses and thoughts that aren’t ours? Or are we moving in the direction of the authenticity of our thoughts and actions, doing and deciding what is best for us and our journey? Let us give ourselves permission to let go of the voices that hold us captive to a life that isn’t ours, and let us embrace our own inner voice…let us give it life…let us celebrate the uniqueness of our journey…let us know that we have a voice that matters…and let us be reminded that the world needs us to show up in our full authentic glory so that other’s may benefit from our gifts and our love.